How to achieve world peace

October 8, 2006

BBC NEWS | World | Europe | Iran rejects six nations’ demands
The five permanent UN Security Council members and Germany held talks in the UK on Friday to discuss Iran’s repeated refusal to halt nuclear activities.

You are a developed, democratic country. You can achieve world peace really easily by inconsistently obeying international law, and inconsistently applying it to other, possibly less developed, less democratic countries.

It probably helps to interfere in the international law creation process too. After all, the less self-consistent and coherent international law is, the easier world peace is to achieve! A variation on this process is to participate fully in the development of the international law, often insisting on bizarre amendments that only suit your own national interests, and then at the end of the process refuse to sign up anyway. That method really helps world peace along!

If, on the other hand, you are a less developed, less democratic country, you should really do everything the more developed, democratic countries tell you to do, right away! After all, they are much more developed and democratic than you, so they must be right! And even if the things you are told to do are completely against your national interests, and could compromise your national security, well, you should do them anyway.

Even if the international treaties you’ve signed say you can do the things the developed, democratic countries are telling you not to do. They don’t count. I’ll let you into a secret. The international laws and treaties are really just for show!

We don’t need them. The developed, democratic countries are so kind, fair and wise and would never act in a self-interested way. They’re working so hard for world peace! So you should help them by doing exactly what they say, and then you can be working for world peace too!

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